Lunch Date (brought to you by blogger.com).

I shared lunch at The Wild Fork today with these two lovelies:

You might recognize them as Footy Pajamas and Walking in Memphis, respectively. Lovely ladies, lovely writers.

I've known Leslie for many years through OBU (we were roomies!), and I became close friends with Katie five years ago after moving to our new town. These two gals had never met face to face, but they got to know each other through blogging (even as far back as good ol' Xanga....!), so it feels like we've all known each other for ages.

Les was passing through town on her journeys, so we decided we MUST meet up so the two could 'meet' for the first time. It was so fun to chat and share stories about motherhood, friends, family, etc. for a few hours over a yummy lunch. (And Leslie's baby boy was pretty yummy, too! So good. Just sat quietly and let Mommy chat with her friends. Training him up right!) ;)

Isn't it funny how you feel so connected with another person simply through blogging or using other social networking sites? I love that I can keep up with friends that are far away (or close by!) and still feel involved in their lives even if we can't always meet up in person.

Anyway, it was a fun lunch together! Thanks, gals!

:)

Why You Might See Me Crouching Behind the Fake Flowers.

It is no secret that I frequent the local crafts/hobbies store in town. I bake cakes and cookies as a little side business, I know how to sew, I've helped a couple of friends decorate different parts of their homes, and I just like to create and craft (except for scrapbooking...I'm doing good if I even print the pictures and slide them into a ready-made album. Lame, I know.)

Anyway, while I was pregnant, I had so much fun dreaming up and putting together little E's nursery. I loved finding ideas from different websites or magazines and then trying to make them happen on a budget using sale items from the craft store.

Once my belly bump started showing, there was always one older-lady-cashier who seemed to take special interest in the fact that I was now pregnant. I did not know this woman from Adam, although I used to take cake decorating classes there, so I assumed she recognized me from that. Every time I came into the store, she would go overboard talking about how she couldn't believe I was going to have a baby, how much my belly had grown, how quickly time passes, yadda yadda yadda. At first, I just thought that she must be extra friendly and personable, so I kind of just played along. I would say thank you to her compliments, answer her questions about how I was feeling, and let her pat my ever-growing bump. No biggie. We exchanged smiles each time I came into the store, and, since she is the head cashier, she was always at the first register right by the door. I couldn't miss her!

One day, I headed into the store to pick out some spray paint for my next project (there were many...my poor husband...!), and I took my purchases up to her register since she was the only one open that day. Once again, she began to comment on my belly, etc., but then she called over her manager to come chat with us as she rang up my items. As she was ooh-ing and ahh-ing over my bump, she said to her manager, "And I just can't believe that my Jennifer is all grown up and having her very own baby! She used to babysit for me when my kids were younger. How time flies!"

Um. What?

Jennifer?? Who is that?

Babysitting??

What???

I was so thrown off guard that I lost control of my mouth and I PLAYED ALONG!! I fake laughed and tossed my head as if to say, "Yes, time does fly, and I, Jennifer, can't believe I'm ready to have my own baby!" Good grief! What was I saying?? I was so tired, and my ankles were swollen, and I knew that taking the time to explain that I was, in fact, NOT Jennifer would take longer than just agreeing and moving on...so that's what I did! Not to mention how awkward it would be when she realized that all those months of her fawning over me turned out to be a case of mistaken identity!

As you probably guessed, every single time that I now go into that store, the cashier wants to show off my baby and tell the story about how I used to babysit her kids, and on and on...and I just have to PRETEND!! I feel so stupid!!! But now, how do I go back after months and months have passed and explain to her that I've been pretending this entire time after she mistook me for someone else?!? Ugh. I can't! How awkward.

So. My new plan when needing a craft fix: take a sharp right upon entering the store, walk in a crouched position behind the rows of fake flowers while reaching up to push the cart until I make it safely to the fabric section. And to checkout? I meander around the pottery and plates until I see a second cashier open a register, and then I make a run for it. Sunglasses on before heading for the door, and then I'm free!

Good grief. So ridiculous.

Alas, my game plan didn't work today, though. I got stuck after a slew of blue hairs cut me off at the pass as I headed to cashier number two, prompting older-lady-cashier to excitedly wave me over to her register so she could coo over "Jennifer's new baby"....

Mortifying.

I have got to stop thinking of crafts.

Or move.

;)

Um, Creative?

While browsing one of my favorite design websites, I came upon something rather...unique.

Aw. Cute little teddy bear, right?

WRONG.

That, my friends, is a placenta teddy bear.

Yep. That's right. Someone saved, dried, tanned and stitched together their PLACENTA.

Dis. Gust. Ing.

We used to joke with some of our friends about the whole Tom Cruise/eating the placenta rumor, but this takes it to a whole new level.

Ick.

And now I must go scrub my eyeballs.

You're welcome.

;)

Intruder Alert.

Prepare yourselves. I'm about to brag on my kid. Yes. It's happening.

I must say, this child of mine thoroughly thrills me. She is beautiful, she is mellow, she is sweet, she is adaptable, she is pleasant, she is playful, she is peaceful.

But, these days...she is NOT a good napper. Nope. Not at all. There. I said it. To her, naps are SO overrated and under-appreciated. Naps are out of style. Naps are a waste of time. Naps are for wimps.

Oooooh how I wish she loved naps.

Here's the situation: E is on a pretty regular routine each day. I can't call it a 'schedule,' because we're okay with being flexible with the times, give or take 30 minutes or so. Anyway, she eats about every three hours, and, once she's eaten, she can stay awake for about an hour to an hour and a half. When she starts to rub her eyes or yawn, it is time for a nap. I pop her paci in her mouth, turn off the lights, turn on the fan, and we rock only for a few minutes until the first droop of the eyelid. Then, I place her in her crib where she is responsible for the rest.

And you know what, she does great! She will usually flop around, hold her feet, squirm and coo for a few minutes before putting herself to sleep. This happens whether it is nap time or bed time. She DOES know how to put herself to sleep.

However.

At EXACTLY 45 minutes into her nap, she POPS awake...maaaaaaaad. There is no gradual build up to the angry cries that ensue. She is awake, and she is not happy about it.

At first, I thought that she was just ready to eat again, so I'd try to nurse her. REJECTED. She would scream, squirm and push away from the breast.

Next, I thought that maybe when she woke up mad from her short nap that she was just one of those 'short nappers' I'd heard and read about. I thought that I'd just get her up and let her play pleasantly like she normally would. REJECTED. She was grumpy, fussy, annoyed and fidgety.

After a few weeks of feeling very confused, something I had read during my pregnancy finally dawned on me: The 45-Minute Intruder. Tracy Hogg refers to this culprit in her book, Secrets of a Baby Whisperer, and I quickly flipped back through those particular pages. She explains that babies go through different phases and cycles of sleep just like adults, and sometimes when they transition from deep sleep to a lighter sleep (right at 45 minutes...), babies sometimes can't keep themselves asleep through the transition. This theory is also mentioned in the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. The little babies will pop awake during transition, and they'll be mad about it. And no amount of feeding or playing will help.

DING DING DING!!! This was our problem! Now...for a solution.

Both books suggest different methods of helping your baby learn to go BACK to sleep during their naps should the Intruder be successful at waking them up. Some of the methods were to go in and shush and soothe at intervals, return a paci to their mouths, rock them through the transition, pat their back, tummy, butt, or rub their heads.

Can I just tell you...NONE of these things work with my child. The instant she sees me, it is done. Over. No chance she'll go back to sleep. She'll just stare at me while I'm shushing and patting as if to say, "Uh Mom, pick me up. Right now. Why are you making that weird noise? Please stop. I am not amused with you. Actually, you are annoying me. Stop that. Now."

Ugh.

So, the last option to help her learn to RETURN to sleep was to just let her fuss it all out. Wonderful. Sharpened pencils through the eardrums, anyone? Anyone? No? Just me??

???

The first few days were TERRIBLE. Awful. I sat in my bedroom, monitor turned down (but BRIGHT BLINKING RED LIGHTS blaring at me all the while) and just cried. I cried thinking I had done my child a disservice by not teaching her this skill sooner. I didn't know what I was doing. I was a terrible mother. She would never learn. She would be rejected by society, left to live her life as a troll under a bridge, eating cans of beans cooked over an open flame for dinner. Etc, etc, etc.

You know, regular and perfectly normal worries...

Anyway.

Now, three weeks into this learning process, I am happy to report there has been progress. About 1/3 of the time, she will take a decent nap (no less than an hour, usually two) without even waking up anymore. About 1/3 of the time, she will pop awake right at 45 minutes, fuss just a little bit, look at her hands, check on her feet, twist over to her side and fall back to sleep for another hour or so. However, the other 1/3 of the time...the Intruder prevails.

And Mommy begins shopping online for electric pencil sharpeners.

;)

Thus, we shall continue in our efforts to defeat the Intruder. Some days we will win. Others, we will lose.

But we shall persevere and (hopefully) prevail!

Better Safe.

Recently, I read an article that simply broke my heart. The story was about a woman, a mother, who left in the morning with her baby son in the car heading to take him to daycare. Usually, the father was the one who took the boy to daycare, because the mom had to be at work earlier. For whatever reason, their plans changed, and on that warm summer morning, the tired new mom headed off for the day. When she got to work, she went about her regular routine, and after work was over, she hopped in the car to head to the grocery store to pick up a few items for dinner. Her last stop was the daycare to pick up her son. The mother entered the daycare to puzzled expressions from the workers. "Why wasn't your son here today?", asked the workers. And the mother's heart froze. She raced back out to the car, already knowing what she would find, hoping that she'd be wrong. Her baby boy's lifeless body sat strapped into his car seat. After he'd fallen asleep on the drive that morning, she had simply forgotten he was there, and he couldn't withstand the heat on that summer day.

After crying my way through her story, I read on as the author began to detail how even the best parents can sometimes just get so locked into their routine that they are somehow capable of even the unthinkable: forgetting a sleeping child in a hot car. The author explained how this could happen by using the example of driving home from work and not even having to really tell yourself where to turn or what street to take--it is habit. The brain functions on habit. And when something is thrown in that is out of the routine, the "habit" brain can take over...as in the sad case mentioned above.

The article mentioned a few suggestions to prevent this tragedy from ever happening to readers. You can place your purse/diaper bag in the back floor board so that when you arrive at your destination, you HAVE to get into the backseat to retrieve your belongings. Installing a child-view mirror was another idea. The article also mentioned purchasing a small alarm that you place on the child's car seat, and the key chain receiver will go off if you begin to walk away without your child.

I ordered one of these devices, and it got me thinking. How safe is 'too' safe? How much is too much when it comes to protecting your child? I know some parents who take the philosophy that kids need to get tough and be acclimated to the real world as soon as possible. On the extreme other hand, I know people whom I would consider overprotective of their kids, sheltering them from anything and everything that isn't sunshine and rainbows. Where do I fit in? You?

As parents, you try your best to buy the safest car seat, outlet covers, sensitive skin wash, the softest swaddling blankets, breathable bumpers, baby sunscreen with the highest SPF, faucet bumpers, baby nail clippers, and the list goes on and on.

I guess what I've been pondering is where to draw the line? Is there such a thing as 'too' safe? Obviously, it is never wrong to protect a helpless infant, but when do you begin to pull back a little? Or do you?

If anything, that article was certainly a cautionary tale.

Good Mornin'.

Nothing beats the aroma of my husband's coffee, rocking chairs on the back patio, dew on the grass, a cool breeze in the summer air...

...and waking up to my two favorite people in all the world.

Good morning, indeed.

Dog Days.

I never thought it would happen.

I don't think they did, either.

Who knew that my spoiled little puppy that used to encapsulate my heart and encompass my lap would become...dun dun dun...JUST a dog after Baby came home.

I feel a bit sorry for the dogs, Mabel in particular. She used to have the prime real estate in the house: always carried around, snuggled in my lap anytime we were seated, slept curled in a ball in the crook of my neck at night, rode on my lap in the car, etc. And yes, I'll admit it, I even had a special bag that I would carry her in when she was little in order to smuggle her in and out of our no-dogs-allowed apartment. (Oops!). Mabel reigned supreme as my 'baby' for years, until....now.

(Note that she is in desperate need of a trim. Another sign of the times...!)

Now, there's a new sheriff in town who has claimed the best spots in the house, the best cuddles, the attention, the ooh's and ahh's, and she's even usurped Mabel's prime lap real estate.

When we first brought Baby E home from the hospital, Mabel was NUTS. She barked and growled at every movement, every coo, every cry. My poor Mom was given the task of trying to train Mabel to calm down around the baby...because I was ready to wring her neck! NO BARKING DURING NAP TIME!!!! Gah. Anyway, her grief eventually transitioned from the anger phase into denial and then acceptance. However, poor Mabel, who only weighed in at a whopping four pounds anyway, seemed to lose half of her body weight during the denial phase. She was so frail and small! Poor thing.

Nowadays, everyone has found their place in this new world of ours. The dogs have little to no interest in the baby, but E does like to run her hands or feet all over Milly's fur. Milly could care less. She is kind of a cat-dog in that she really does nothing but lay around all day long, unless it is her day to pee or poo. Seriously. Doesn't even use the bathroom everyday. Weird.

(Milly is scared of the big, black camera being pointed in her direction. Would hardly sit still so that I could capture her misery on film. Rude. ;) )

Anyway, it seems that we are finally all in our places, including the dogs. No more growling, no more barking at the slightest twitch of the hand, no more moping around.

But I still sense a little bit of jealousy as Mabel stares with disdain over the playroom that was once her living room palace.

These truly are her dog days of summer.

;)

4 Months: A Letter.

Birdie,

I won't say once again how fast time is flying by us. I won't say once again that I can't believe you have been with us for this long now. I won't say that I want time to slow down and maybe even stop for a little bit so we can soak you in.

I won't say it.

But I'm thinking it. ;)

Here are some of the accomplishments, struggles and experiences of your fourth month, my love.

Growth:

-At four months and one week, you weighed 16.7 pounds, and you were 27 inches long...! You are so tall! You measured in the 99th percentile in height and the 95th for weight.

-Your little strawberry has stopped growing it seems, and it is turning grey in the middle--a sign that the last phase is starting! The involution phase means that the hemangioma is starting to go away. Your little strawberry has become such a part of you, and we'll kind of miss kissing your little 'love button' once it goes away totally.

(2 months)

(3 months)

(4 months)

Eating:

-You are now consistently eating every three hours during the day. You eat around 8, 11, 2, 5, 8, 11 (dream feeding), and then you eat one more time in the middle of the night--you are HUNGRY at that middle-of-the-night feeding!

-Still a fast eater--only about 10 minutes per side, and only one side at a time. I'm not complaining!

-When Dad or other family feed you, you are taking a bottle with a slow-flow nipple very well. We try to give you a bottle a day or every two days just so you'll keep up with that skill.

-When you finish eating, I sit you up on my knees to wait for a burp, and you give me the biggest smile which quickly turns into a bashful smile, complete with your hands coming in front of your face to 'hide'....LOVE THIS. Love it.

-While you nurse, you like to run your fingers through my hair. You don't pull on it like you do our clothes or your toys; instead, you gently run your open palm down my hair over and over. It is precious.

-It is not precious when you try to roll over while nursing. Not at all. ;)

Sleeping:

-Now that our lives have calmed down, we have begun the dreaded sleep training. You take three naps a day, but right at the 45 minute mark, you wake up MAD. No amount of my soothing attempts or nursing will help. You are just still tired. It's that simple. It took me awhile to figure out that you just needed to learn to fall back asleep on your own, even if you have to cry for a little bit. Sometimes you cry for a long bit...but the crying is getting shorter and shorter each day. You just have to learn to let go and fall back to sleep. Sometimes you do it perfectly, but other times it takes awhile. It is still hit and miss if you will be able to do it, but you're learning slowly but surely.

-You are in your own room in your crib for sleep all the time now. It was so hard for Mommy to move you out of the safety of our bedroom, but this new arrangement is working well for all of us. You don't seem to have noticed a change. ;)

-At night, you will sleep anywhere from 5-7 hour stretches any given night. Once you are all trained up on your naps and able to put yourself back to sleep a little better, we'll work on dropping the middle-of-the-night feeding. When you do wake up in the middle of the night, you eat voraciously and then fall right back to sleep (if you even fully wake up), so my gut says you are just not ready to drop that feeding that quite yet. Maybe in a few weeks.

-You still sleep with your arms flung up above your head like when you were first home from the hospital, but sometimes we watch you on the monitor as you try and get over on your side to sleep. You'll fling one little arm over your face and fall back to sleep on your side. Precious.

-When you are getting tired, you start up serious 'conversations' with us in your little raspy voice. You'll suck your fingers, a blanket or a paci to help sooth yourself. We'll rock you only until your eyes start to droop, and then it is up to you do the rest on your own. You're getting there, baby!

Play:

-You laughed at Mommy twice!! I was kissing on your yummy little neck, and you belly laughed twice! Oooohhh. Melt my heart.

-You know how to reach out for something and grab it on purpose now. And once you've grabbed the item, it goes right into your mouth!

-I can leave you alone to play (while I watch from across the room, of course) for quite awhile before you get bored. I want you to learn to be content on your own, but just for a bit! I'll always come back! :)

-We borrowed a bouncy seat from a friend, and you love it so much! It is way cooler than the plain, beige bouncy we had for you, and it lights up and sings when you kick the little toys hanging from it. I can tell this has taught you to find your feet! You can now grab your toes and stare at this new wonder. :)

-You are SO close to rolling over, but you haven't quite figured out how to get your little arm out of the way. You'll flop your hips and legs to one side, followed by a turn of the head...but your little arm is still in the way! You'll get there....

-SCRATCH THAT! You did it! You rolled over just a few days ago, Baby!!! You went from back to tummy three times! The first time, I was laying with you on the floor checking something on my phone, and I looked up after two seconds...and you were over on your belly smiling up at me! You are pretty proud of yourself each time you roll over. So sweet.

-Recently, you've started to notice that we have two puppies running around the house, and you'll follow them with your eyes if they come close. Sadly, they have no interest in you at this point. Don't be offended. They are just jealous. ;)

-Your aunt Caitlin bought you a little toy puppy to keep in the car named Douglas, and you love him! You get so excited if someone dangles him over your face while you lay on the ground; all your limbs go stiff and wave around so excitedly until he gets dropped on your tummy for you to grab...and put in your mouth.

-You smile so big now! Not all the time and not always on command, but if I talk to you in a low, goofy voice, you'll just beam up at me. And when Dad sings to you, you smile so big and just sit still and listen. Sweet girl.

-You like to clasp your little hands in front of your face and hold them there for so long. It looks like you are either praying or simply waiting for the next entertainment to start up. So cute.

Events:

-You went to the church nursery for the first time a few weeks ago. Again, Mommy was more nervous than I needed to be, and you did so great. The little ladies working in the nursery seriously wouldn't hand you to me for a few minutes when I went to pick you up. They loved you!

-We went on a family trip to Fin and Feather with your Grandmama and Aunt Caitlin. You were a good little traveler once again, except you did NOT enjoy your first dip into a swimming pool! Maybe when you're a little older....

-You also had your first overnight trip away from home! You went to Grandma and Papa's house to spend the night, and they loved having you. I wondered if we'd get you back, actually...! We missed you, but it was good for you to learn to spend the night away from home...even though we were there bright and early to pick you up the next day. ;)

-Father's Day! Daddy was so happy to be a DADDY this year! You made him smile so much that day. He loves you so.

-Your first July 4th! While we were very excited for this 'first' experience for you, the constantly popping fireworks made it hard for you to sleep the week before and after the actual holiday. Poor baby. You would be sound asleep and then get startled awake. Maybe next year you will enjoy this holiday....!

You, my dear, are the greatest joy in the world. Dad and I really don't remember what we did before you entered the world. You have joined our lives so seamlessly, and I have to say that I am so proud to be your Mommy.

You are my favorite.

I love you so,

Mommy

Roll With It.

Yesterday:

-Baby E rolled over for the first time!

-She laughed out loud at me twice!

-Took three perfect naps with no crying!

-Slept seven hours in a row!

-(Mommy was so proud!)

Today:

-Screaming mad during her entire first nap.......ugh.

-(Mommy is considering jamming sharpened pencils through her ears at this very moment.)

It's gonna be one of those days, I do believe, and we'll just have to roll with it.

I'll just keep replaying yesterday over and over in my head. ;)

Wanna see??

Fourth on the Third.

This weekend, we had our families out to the house to do a little early Independence Day celebration. The husband was King of the Grill (and the Smoker), and everyone else brought delicious side dishes to go along with the meal. We had more food than we knew what to do with!

Every year that we've lived in this more rural neighborhood, our neighbors down the street have put on a huge fireworks display, but it is always held on July 3rd. So, I decided we'd piggy back on our neighbor's party and have one of our own in order to enjoy the free neighborhood fireworks show.

And, wouldn't you know it, NO SHOW! :( However, the men-folk headed out to the closest fireworks stand, purchased some ammunition and put on a little impromptu show at the back of our property.

We are so blessed to have such wonderful family, to have been given this lovely daughter of ours, and to live in a country where I can freely write TO GOD BE THE GLORY FOR IT ALL!

Happy Independence Day.

(Husband's surprise breakfast he made this morning in honor of the holiday. Gotta love that guy.)

In-Law.

I have written many posts about my close relationship with my mom and sister. We are the "Hart girls," and we have seen each other through some really hard things and some really good things. I could not live without them in my life, and we are so blessed to have such a unique, uncommon and unbreakable closeness.

As I think about my family make up, I would be remiss if I did not also consider how my in-law family plays into my life. When one hears the description "in-law," snide parodies from sitcoms come to mind in which the overbearing mother-in-law descends upon the family to correct and critique, the goofy father-in-law bumbles in to fart, itch and belch, and the poor, put-upon wife has to endure it all with a few pointed eye-rolls thrown in for good measure.

This not the case with my in-laws.

I have heard many friends moan and groan through stories of their in-laws, and I have to sit back and hold my tongue. I can't match their stories, I can't commisserate their woes, and I can't actually empathize with them.

What I'm saying is that I truly was blessed with the family I married into.

While it has taken time to get to know them on a deeper level as is the case with any new relationship, what has grown from that time is a feeling of family, real family. I feel like I belong when I am in the group, and that is no small feat in and of itself (I have a large, boisterous, and jovial in-law family, and it took awhile to get over feeling a bit shy and overwhelmed since I come from a family of three...!). I know that I can walk into their home and join right in with whatever is going on that day. I'm not annoyed or awkward when left alone (without my husband) with any members of the family, and I truly enjoy the time I get to spend with them.

God knew what I would need in an in-law family when he brought Russell and I together...even before then, I'm sure. He knew I would need a brother to joke around with, a brother who would challenge my outlook on the world, a brother who showed such a good example to his own younger brother. God knew I would need sisters to shop with, sisters to talk to about the 'girly' things, sisters who would open my eyes to art in many different forms, sisters to teach me through their own struggles and lives how to strive forward and persevere.

God knew that I would need another example of a mother who sacrifices it all for her children, a mother who raised such an amazing, humble, selfless, accountable, driven, helpful, playful, wonderful son, a mother that guides me and teaches me through her own examples of perseverance and quiet strength, a mother who shares my love of all things aqua and beach-y, and a mother who exemplifies the special relationship Naomi must have had with her daughter-in-law, Ruth. Now I get that. I understand that unique bond between that mother-in-law and her daughter-in-law.

God knew that I would need a father. A dad. He knew that I would need to see what that looks like on a day to day basis. Although it made me uncomfortably sad at first, I have grown to learn what it is like to interact with that kind of a father-figure. A father who loves his family more than anything, a father that is tender with his wife and helpful with neighbors and friends, a father who does fart and snort and scratch and belch just like the sitcom father, yet somehow gets me laughing all the while, a father who leads his family with humor, patience and humility.

He can fall asleep anywhere...gotta love him. ;)

A few days ago, I was at my parents-in-law's home, still hurting from my recent surgery. I was moping and pretty down about the whole situation, and they just let me cry. My husband was visiting his cousins, and I was there, crying, snotting, snuffling, while his parents just listened and encouraged and commiserated. I realized later that I didn't feel awkward or embarrassed to be vulnerable with them--that is a true sign of FAMILY. In the end, they had me laughing and joking and eating chocolate cake. That is just like them--they make you feel comfortable and loved and like you can make it through anything. And then they give you cake. ;)

They love their family, they love me, and it is so wonderful to watch them love my baby. Those moments are priceless.

I have such respect for this family, and I seriously have no idea what I did to deserve the way God uses them to bless my life.

I'm a lucky girl.